How to save yourself from getting stuck in the “comfy mum” fashion rut.

We all have things that we put off doing, mostly things that mean putting ourselves first. Something I had been procrastinating about was getting my act together when it came to clothes and style. I needed one, a style that is!

Now 40, a stay at home mum and business owner (which I run from home) I had adopted a fashion sense I would describe as “ the comfy mum.”  I was living the dream (or not) in jeans, boots and a cardigan – woohoo!!

My mum uniform was simply that.  Every day was the same.  Every day I would look in the wardrobe, feel totally uninspired, and reach for my go to jeans and jumper.

I had plenty of clothes but that age old problem of nothing to wear.  Nothing seemed to match, and there was very little colour to speak of.

I wasn’t totally inept at choosing clothes, but keeping up with trends and fashion was never my thing. Even in my teens and twenties I wasn’t that fussed. Although I’d made it this far in life without any major fashion faux pas,  the fact of the matter was I was stuck in a rut. Sticking to the same functional, sensible, and frankly dull daily attire.


Whilst seeking out ways of being truly me, the person on the inside was beginning to shine brightly and I wanted this to show on the outside.

So how did I make the change? How did I save myself from “the comfy mum” fashion rut?

I got help.

I had been gifted a colour consultation with Ishbel’s Wardrobe as a present.  This was the perfect opportunity to get help, and realise my dream of creating and owning a wardrobe of clothes that not only fitted my personality and my body shape, but a choice of colours that would make me sparkle and shine.

Reshma at Ishbel’s Wardrobe welcomed me into her home, and her beautiful workspace for my consultation.  We talked about colour and she explained how depending on your skin tone, you may suit warm or cooler colours.  Using endless samples of coloured cloth to lay against my skin, she was able to determine which colours best complemented me.  She identified my WOW colours, those that I could wear from head to toe, and feel fabulous in.

All of this was a revelation to me.  I would never have worked it all for myself.  I definitely needed expert help, and it wasn’t long before I was back having a style consultation a few weeks later, to discover my clothing personality to complete the picture.

Although such services do come at a cost, the saving in the long term is going to be priceless. Using my personal colour swatch to edit my wardrobe and when out shopping,  I now have a neat capsule wardrobe to mix and match (although I would of course like more.) And when I wear it I feel like me both on the inside and out!

I never thought of colour and style as being part of your personality.  The whole process has certainly been enlightening, and it has saved me.  I am no longer stuck in the “comfy mum” rut.

pexels-photo-301367I now have lots of colour in my life and even wear pink lipstick, something I never imagined was me, but turns out it is.  I love my lipstick, and now never leave the house without it on (most of the time.)

I don’t always get it right , and I still love to pull on my favourite jeans, but now I wear them with a bright top, pretty scarf, or tailored jacket, and some sparkle to bring out the princess in me.

So having sorted my colour and style, what was I to do with my hair.

woman-morning-bathrobe-bathroomI’ve always highlighted my hair, I love being a blonde.   It needs some chemical help to get me there now, but that’s life.  Always with a strong wave to my hair, I fought to straighten it for years. Spending hour’s blow drying and hot brushing it to remove any trace of a curl.

So why was I so unaccepting of my hair and my curls for so long.  My late big sister had beautiful chocolate (almost auburn in the light) brown curly hair.  In our younger years we would go out together and not be recognised as sisters, me with my blonde straight hair and her with her bouncy brown curls.  We just looked like friends, which is exactly what we were in truth.   But I think I was a little fearful of the reaction I would get if I allowed my natural curl to take centre stage.  Looking in the mirror I could only see her at first, and I felt uneasy with this for a while.

But I was growing in confidence with my new found style, daring to wear more colour, and even lipstick.  The uneasy feeling soon turned to acceptance, and it just felt like the right thing to do.  I now look in the mirror with fond memories of my big sister and choose every day to embrace my curls as they are what being truly me is all about.

So, what’s next? Writing and journaling has become a daily occurrence for me now, and I’d like to share with you how this has helped me on this journey to healing, and being truly me.

Charlotte x

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